If I could have just one wish, it would be that my third testicle resembled Julius Caesar
Camels should be crushed by large tinfoil crushing machines; the resulting camel paste should be utilized as a decorative cake mix.
Anyone that wants to be a born-again Christian should nuke an unborn gay baby whale for Jesus.
Chex mix, breakfast hot pockets, and milk are the best dinner in the world.
Michael Jackson's penis ought not be laughed at so much. Just because it is small and contains anthrax spores does not mean its appearance or functionality is humorous in any way, shape, or form. If you are laughing at his penis, please stop. If you see someone laughing at his penis, please tell them to stop... unless of course it's a child; they are merely expressingly childhood laughter, it's a beautiful thing.
My laughter cures cancer, unless you have cancer and it is not cured by my laughter... in that case, God hates you.
Midgets should be enslaved by us normal people.
The movie King Kong was about a trouble-making monkey who liked to throw his poo.
Bill Braskey hated Mexicans. Bill Braskey was part Mexican. Bill Braskey also hated irony.
I kind of admire the Nazis for their organization and sense of purpose. Man, they could really get things done. Further, they could make damn fine furniture and lamp shades with their increcible apholstering skills.
Communism will work, and you will like it.